A few weeks later, the whole family was to meet with the oncology team. I remember clearly, on the drive there, telling my husband to stop at Dunkin’ Donuts drive through. I ordered two cream filled donuts and a coffee Coolada®. I ate/drank the entire order, then looked at my husband and said ‘never let me do that again.’
That was the moment I realized I was an emotional eater.
Fast forward 12 years to January of 2017. I was again faced with the sudden death of my dad, also from cancer. This time I did not feed my emotions like I did when my mom passed. Instead, I tried feeling all the feels even though it sucked. I wasn’t exactly eating chicken and broccoli, but I didn’t dive head first into cream filled donuts either.
Fast forward one more time to May 15th, 2018. My best friend and canine soul mate, Aspen, was diagnosed with a Hemangiosarcoma (bleeding tumor) in the abdomen that has spread to her lungs. On that day, my world seemed to crash.
As I write this blog post, Aspen is laying by my feet. She’s stable, but the end is definitely near.
So, how am I really dealing with this hard emotion as an emotional eater? To be honest, not the best.
I go from not eating to then eating what I shouldn’t, like ice cream for dinner. I’m also not sleeping either. But, I am allowing myself to feel all the feelings associated with knowing I’m losing my best friend.
For those like me, emotional eaters, my biggest advice as a health coach and as a human…. just do the best you can.
I no longer try to put on a brave face in front of people while hiding the fact that I’m scarfing down sugary foods to help console me. I now put on whatever face happens to be there at the time, which this week, has been a very teary one. I feel every feeling and if I have to, I eat a donut. Not because I’m pushing away the feelings, but because I can’t stomach eating eggs or chicken or broccoli or salad, or food in general. I even had a hard time with the ice cream. So, finding something I will actually eat is the goal for now.
If you are an emotional eater, or a stress eater, I want to hear from you. What have you done to help get you through tough times without eating away your feelings?